As long as I’ve been alive I’ve wanted to be an actor. Badly.
Except for the brief period at the beginning of my childhood when I thought I could be a singer; but it took one girl better than me to kill that dream expeditiously. We thank God for opening my eyes. Anyway, I wanted to be an actor because obviously I saw this as my gift and could clearly envision myself doing it. I felt this so strongly that I spent every waking moment obsessing over it. Constantly looking for auditions (in America btw.. I don’t know how I thought I was getting there?) and more often, watching tv and mimicking the actors in my own, I guess ‘makeshift’ drama school.
I specifically wanted to be a child actor. I genuinely thought Miley and them man were my friends, they just didn’t know it yet. So you can imagine how distraught I was when year after year Disney Channel did not bell my line. I thought “I’m full of talent! I know I’m a star. I know all I do is sit at home daydreaming about stardom but why has no one come to collect me yet?!” (Truthfully I did think a talent scout would just knock on my door one day and take me to Hollywood). With this mindset, I spent the majority of my life confused as to how no one else could see what I see.
Fast forward many years and thankfully, I have now had drama training and been in a few acting projects. So now that I have gotten older and know what is required of you on a professional set, I realised that… there was no way anyone should have let young me anywhere near a HD camera and a global audience. 😂😂😂
I cringe at the thought of younger me thinking I could do a better job than some of the actors I saw on TV. Nowadays I watch and commend them for simply having the courage to do what looks so easy but is actually so hard.
I was not ready! What I saw as a talent or a gift in my eyes was a passion for something that I really knew nothing about. I had no clue about the industry and I had no training. So even if I had a gift, if I had been given the opportunity, I had no idea how to use it. Again, we thank God for opening my eyes.
This made me realise that this is a common occurrence. I often see a lot of people talking about how they are ‘underrated’ and ‘not supported’ meanwhile a lot of us are simply underdeveloped and unrefined. There is no doubt that you are gifted. However whether you have polished that gift, or even positioned yourself to showcase that gift is another story.
I remember speaking to a friend once that told me they did not feel supported in their endeavours and I was so confused. I know I am a supportive person and anything my friends do, I want the world to know about. So when they said this, I was racking my brain thinking of what they had done that I had not supported. I knew they were talented, but they had nothing to support! I asked them “with what exactly?” and after receiving a mumbled “you know, my stuff” I saw what I and a lot of others do, from the outside looking in. We expect others to see what God has placed within us without actually showing them.
I'm sure Elon Musk had the idea for the Tesla years before we knew about it. However that was between him and God. If he ran around talking about a car that drives itself with nothing to back it up, everyone would think he was mad. We can't support that because we can't see it and that's not our fault! He probably had multiple rejections based on the concept alone until he showed someone something substantial. Now that we have seen the finished project, we have no choice but to praise his hard work because the greatness is undeniable. The same way, we need to put things out there that may not be perfect right away but has been refined so that people can buy into the greatness that we have within.
We often want people to praise us and applaud us over a gift that is still in its raw form. If you gave me a chunk of gold that was still in it’s raw form right now, I'd probably look at you like “Do you hate me?”. However, if you gave me a gold necklace or ring? Ehen now we're talking! They both have the same value but one has been refined. The refined one looks better, it is more presentable. It is more likely to draw people in. As we move forward, let's work on refining ourselves so that when we do get into our relevant spaces, we're ready! And our greatness is undeniable.